I was reading this article on Slate about how these parents have made a conscious decision to not post any photos of their child online. They remove tags from Facebook if a friend includes the kid in a photo, they purchased the web domain for her name, signed up for email addresses, the works. They are trying to maintain online anonymity for their child and when she’s old enough they will give her the “keys” to the digital portfolio. A clean slate, if you will. Some of their reasoning seems sound, if somewhat paranoid, but I don’t see myself following the same trend. Everything is so invasive right now that I don’t know that it would really make a difference in the end. And I like posting photos of Ezra and the amazingly non-biased adorable things he does.
On a completely different note, do you folks spank your kids, smack hands or yell in frustration? I’ll admit, I have smacked Ezra’s hands a couple times. I’ll get frustrated that he’s picking up the rabbit poo again, or playing with nails under the deck. I raised my voice quite a bit the other day when I came downstairs to find he had gone into my bedroom and opened white fingernail polish and dumped it on the sheets. It’s so hard for me to remember sometimes that he’s not yet two even, and probably doesn’t have a strong handle on anything. I’m thinking it’s probably more of an in-the-moment situation right now for him.
But after I yell, or smack hands, I feel terribly guilty. I mean, I don’t yell frequently, or smack his hands often, but still, guilt. And lately Ezra has been hitting himself or inanimate objects (like the chair or fridge) when he’s thwarted by something. I think to myself, is he doing that because he has seen me do it? Or is it perhaps that is an age-appropriate response because he cannot yet articulate what he’s feeling?
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Honestly, I don’t know. Maybe it’s a bit of both. I was talking with Jesse in the backyard about this, and I have to acknowledge that I need to better and take ownership of those situations. Yes, he should not have dumped nail polish on my bed, but I should have made sure he was coralled upstairs, or I should have closed the bedroom door so he didn’t have access to the polish. Yes, he should not have opened the fridge and dumped the contents of the milk onto the chair, but I should have made sure the child lock was in place. Parenting is rough, I tell you. It’s all about learning moments, for me as well as Ezra.
I do want to be clear that I have nothing against spanking every now and then. I think of generations past where corporal punishment was the standard, and we’re not a society of psychopaths. But still, I can be better about redirection of attention and trying to spot things before they happen. Something to strive for, anyway.
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